2008 here were come!

It's absolutely impossible to recap the amount of change that has happened in our world just in the last month. For starters, December 1, the girls turned FOUR! ACK! I don't even know how this happened. They had a great party and here's just one pic of the indoor (yes, I could not even believe it myself) bouncer we had in the house.

The second week of Demember brought a heart surgery for my mom, which was very rough on her and she was slow to recover. At the same time we were hit by an ice storm - I really hate those. Here's what havoc that wreaked upon us. The pictures still make me ache a little. The girls had a little fun out on the ice though.

We made it through all that and got to the third week of December which brought with it the news that I didn't get the job I was so excited about, and that I was sure was meant for me. There's a lot more to this story, but I'll spare you absolutely insane details and leave it at that. Needless to say, both Fred and I were bitterly dissapointed. Ironically, Fred applied to a few different aircraft companies up the turnpike in Tulsa that same week.

Along came Christmas and we had an absolute fabulous time. The girls loved every minute of it. They made cookies for Santa (they got a little burnt, but Santa didn't seem to mind at all).

We spent the few days before Christmas in Tulsa with Fred's family. Here's our first gingerbread house.

Here are the girls using their cousins, Kevin and Paige, as horses.

We came back from Tulsa and celebrated Christmas with my family on the 26th. That's when they got their gift from mommy and daddy.

That about wraps up December, I think.

Now, for the big news of January. I've already mentioned that Fred applied for some jobs in Tulsa. Well, he was also interested in attending the Spartan College of Aeronautics that is there to get a degree and become a licensed airline mechanic. Yesterday a representative from the college came and talked to us and Fred applied and was told there should be no problem with him being accepted. They will also help him with job placement during school and after school and for the rest of his career. So, if he should lose his job, want a new one or different location the school continues to help with this. They will even help me find a job. So, that's the big news. We're moving to Tulsa!

It's unbelievable how this all happened really. Fred's start date is July, and can be earlier if we can arrange everything that quickly. So, we have to finish out our kitchen remodel and get this house on the market now. Be praying for us that everything will fall into place quickly and the transition is as smooth as possible for everyone. This will be a big change for not only us, but also for my parents who will really miss the girls. We'll keep you posted and I'll try to keep up with this blog a little more often. :)

Time Marches On

I know, I know, long time no blogging. Things have been in major upheaval lately which I'll explain as I go.

First of all, let me just say, Thanksgiving was wonderful. It was so great to spend time with my family with FOUR uninterrupted days of bliss. Tomorrow it's back to all the terrible issues that await me at work. My work phone died on Thursday evening and I had no charger for it (forgot it at work) and I didn't even think about it. I am really past the point of caring right now.

We celebrated this years festivities at my sister's new house and she cooked the turkey. We were all waiting in great suspense to see how it would turn out, but the self professed "black sheep cook" of the family did a fabulous job. My duties were the Apple crisp pie (Fred's absolute favorite), the green bean cassarole (my favorite), and the cranberry delight (my made up name for a wonderfully light fresh cranberry dessert from Fred's mom). I also did some bread. It was all great!

Now, it's on to Christmas, but first, it's the girls FOURTH (ACK!) birthday!!!!!! I cannot even believe it! But it will be great fun!

In other job related news, work has been awful. I have had yet another baby death. This will make three in two years. I don't know if it's worse, since I only work with drug affected infants, or what, but it doesn't really matter. It's all terrible and hard to deal with. Then the good news. In the last month I have applied for and been interviewed, twice, for a job as a legislative assistant to a state representative at our state capital. I am supposed to hear by the end of this week if I got it. Say a prayer that it works out. I know if it's what God wants it will, but I hate waiting. It would be normal hours and a pay raise. A truly wonderful thing!

The Bad Boo-Boo

Well, here it is, the first black eye...

Boy, is it a doozie! It looks just awful. It happened Monday evening. The girls were playing with their little two-seater kid swing that is in their playroom. Bekah was laying under it for some reason and Rachel didn't see her. She swung it and BAM!

Here it is Tuesday morning

So, it's gotten a little worse every day so far. Hopefully, it will start to heal up quickly. Of course, their school pictures would be next week. Maybe it will be at least faded enough to cover it with some concealer. Poor thing. I just cringe every time I see it. It looks so painful, but she says it doesn't hurt. I suppose it doesn't as she never complains about it.

When I told her she had a black eye she said, "No I don't, Mommy, my eyes are brown!" HA! Then yesterday she told me she was going to tell Rachel's teacher what happened to her eye. When I asked her if she was going to tell her own teacher too she matter-of-factly told me, "No, my teacher only talks about school things, she doesn't talk about boo-boo's." I just laugh. She has not idea how funny she is. A very literal girl, for sure.

It's a disease, no really, I promise!

Or so I say to my husband in very poor defense of my awful propensity to purchase footwear. Whether it's for me or the girls, I just have an awful time saying no. So, of all places I go to Walmart today to buy an onion...AN ONION! What do I walk out with? The tiniest little black Mary Janes with diamonds on the toes...plus...I have my eyes on the CUTEST black knee boots. Why do they make those darn little shoes so cute?! AAARRRGGHHH!!!!!!!

It was not by accident that God gave us TWO girls. It was for my own good. If I just had one I know my willpower would utterly and completely fail and I could not stop myself. She would have at least 20 pair of shoes, I am sure. But, seeing as how everything must be doubled it puts and end to my impulsive shoe fettish. Oh the agony!

Poor Fred, he just looked at me with pity - or at least I hope that was the look on his face. I know he doesn't truly understand, after all, how could anyone who only owns four pair of shoes really relate?

Oh well. I would say that I need help or something cliche like that, but the truth is, I like it! I LOVE buying shoes. It's therapeutic...no really, I swear! :)

The Prodigal Kitty...

...has now returned. So, I researched my little fingers off and found "the" kitty on Ebay and we now have a new one. Bekah seemed a little suspect, but only for half a minute. Then she was elated to have her kitty back and has carried it everywhere since then.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately, but I just have to say that every day I am just amazed at how much more I love my girls. It almost sounds crazy to say it that way, but it's so true. I am totally in awe of how much I absolutely enjoy their company. Sure were have our crazy, stressful, whiny (them and me) moments, but for the most part they are growing into these little tiny people that honestly amaze me.

It really hit me tonight. I didn't actually get to see them before bed time because I had to take a child to a shelter home two hours away. By the time I got home they had been in bed for two hours, but I called as they were getting ready for bed. Bekah got on the phone and had close to a five minute conversation with me. I was totally amazed since she usually avoids the phone (only the real ones, not play ones) like the plague. Rachel talked too, but only for a minute or two, but still a real feat.

I am so thankful for them. My life is so much more full and joyful since they came. They are a constant source of joy and help me find something to laugh about each day. And, since laughter is medicine for the heart I figure they will help me stay young for a very very long time!

Tragedy at the Zoo

I mean this slighty tounge-in-cheek, but mostly in all earnestness. We decided to take advantage of the cooler day (only in the upper 90's today) and take the girls to the zoo this evening. We haven't been since early May when the temps and humidity were of a bareable degree. We arrived and in good form. Everyone had had a nap, no potty issues today and we were all in a great mood. Bekah, as usual, had to take at least one very small kitty with her - not a big deal since she carries it and doesn't ask eveyone else to.

First on the list was, of course, the elephants. They always love those. Then rhino's. Next it was off to the Oklahoma Trails exhibit of the zoo to see all the animals you find in Oklahoma. First bobcats, then cougar, white-tailed deer, wild turkey's, bird house, then their favorite - the bat house along with spiders and owls. Then rounding the bend come the black bears, aquariums and last, but not least, the alligator pit. This is when sadness and sorrow overcame our otherwise great excursion.

Bekah had been faithfully showing her kitty every animal we had seen so far. Whether it be a field mouse or black bear, or snake, the kitty saw it. I had just lifted her up to see into the alligator pit and bid her a fair warning not to drop her kitty as we could not get her back. The breath from the last word still on my lips, my eyes beheld a tiny little kitty plummet into the pit below. This was not good.

Immediately great big tears began to fall from her eyes. "Mommy you have to get her." "Bekah, I can't get down there and even if I could those are alligators! They could bite my arm off!" She wailed - and I mean wailed! She refused to leave the scene. "I can't leave her, she will be so sad. I know she's scared" All said through great gasps and tears. Of course, there were no zoo keepers to be found. We looked - and looked. She was inconsolable. She wanted to see no more animals.

We finally did see a zoo employee who we told - not so much to get the kitty back, but it would probably not be the best thing if one of the alligators should decide to make a snack of the poor stuffed animal. And just if there were any hope at all of recovering the poor animal the lady not so kindly pointed out that there was no way it would be recovered.

We did end up walking around to see other animals. Eventually she did stop crying, but she never stopped talking about it. She insisted that she could not leave her kitty as it was her job to take care of her. I did the only thing I could think of to do. I told her that Jesus would watch over her kitty and take care of her since she couldn't and that the zoo keeper would get her out. It seemed to give her some relief, but I could tell the guilt she felt was great. It was really breaking my heart. It sounds so silly to say that, but it's not over the stuffed animal, it was over my poor Bekah. Even when we left she said, "Mommy, I'm sorry I dropped my kitty. I was supposed to take care of her." I just told her it was just a terrible accident and that she didn't mean for it to happen.

After we put the girls in bed tonight I heard them talking over the monitor. Rachel told Bekah she was so sorry about her kitty, but they could pray for her. And so they did. It was the sweetest thing I have ever heard. Rachel said, "Jedus, take of Bekah's kitty, don't let those green alligators get her."

So, while there was tragedy at the Zoo. What I learned from this was that my girls are learning to trust God. That they veiw him as very real, and that He cares about whatever we care about. And that is not tragic in the least. The faith of a child -- how it can rock your world.

"Scared in Oklahoma"

So, I haven't really talked about this here, or in real life either (perhaps believing that if I don't speak it it won't be true), but my girls are going to pre-school this fall. Yes, I know, say it ain't so! I am still skaking my head in disbelief. To me they still seem so tiny and how could they really go to school??? ACK! Then, as if all these thoughts weren't bad enough I went to "parent's night" last night.

Oh my GOSH!

I am SO not ready for this. Not really for the girls -- but for me! Just the sheer thought of having to interact with other parents whose children will be in the same classes as the girls struck fear into the core of my being. Why, I have no clue. I felt so totally out of place, I saw other moms there who I went to college with...it just doesn't seem right. It my short 3.5 years as a parent (and as a DHS caseworker) I have discovered that parenting is really more political that politics itself. Why I am so intimidated by this new era in life, I cannot tell you. Hopefully I will look back in a month or so and laugh at myself.

"Our" first day is Friday....Lions and Tigers and Bears, OH MY!

Conversations with Bekah

Today was definitely a day to stay in bed. I slept very little last night as we were experiencing the first ever (as far as my memory serves) tropical depression in Oklahoma. LOTS of rain, wind and thunder. The latter being the biggest sleep disrupter. Then, to top it off, my dear husband was violently ill from whatever combination of things he had eaten. All this to say I don't really have anything great to post, but thought you would enjoy my recent (before the rain) conversation with a 3 year old.

Scene: I am getting water to water some hanging plants on the porch that were in serious need of some attention. Two little girls following closely behind.

Bekah: "Mommy, what are you getting that water for?"
Me: "For the plants so they won't die."
Bekah: "Yeah, like Scar, he makes everything dead." (think Lion King)
Rachel: "I don't like Scar. He's mean."
Bekah: "Well, I just have a little toy one, if that will be fine?"
Rachel: "OK"
Short pause here as I finish watering
Bekah: "Are they dead?"
Me: "Not yet, I hope they will be alright."
Bekah: "Yeah, when I'm dead I just can't wake up."
Me (Chuckling): "Bekah, you have never been dead."
Bekah: "Oh, I haven't? I guess I was just taking a little nap then."

I will miss terribly these days of such conversations. Part of me wishes I could just freeze frame this time and prolong it. Alas, I know it won't last forever. I will enjoy every minute that it's here.

Hotter than Hades!

I really don't know what Hell feels like (and don't want to know), but I think it must be something about like it feels in Oklahoma these days. You step outside and the heat and humidity immediately hit you in the face. Instantly you feel as if you can't breathe. Your steering wheel in your car is too hot to touch and your burning half a tank of gas for your car air conditioner to be on full blast. All to no avail as you sweat profusely to wherever you may be headed.

So, what can one do for a little escape? We decided to go to the dollar movies. Not just me and the Mr., though, we actually took the girls! Yes, that's right it was their first actual movie in the theatre! We took them to see Shrek: The Third. They loved it, and they did great! We were so proud of them. Shrek is a family affair. Our first date (or date incognito, depending on who is telling the story) was to see Shrek. Then we saw the second Shrek right before the girls were born. Now, the Third we actually got to take them to. We are hitting so many milestones right now it's just incredible.

Before I know it I'll be teaching them to drive. OY!

So....here's what I have been up to the last three months

For starters....I went to Mary Kay Seminar in Dallas at the end of July. Had a total BLAST! a wonderful four days with my MK unit members, heard some great speaches from our Nationals and totally got re-energized!

Here's my Cadillac convertible I'll be driving when I debut as a National Sales Director!

For fun, here's a pic of Me, Lauren and Kathy in the back of the new smokey gray Pontiac Vibe that consultants can earn....or the new gray Pontiac G6 which I intend to be driving by Christmas!

Seminar was just way too much fun! We were so busy and it was SO hot, but worth every minute.

I learned a lot of great things and have been putting them into action this month. My goal is to gold medal this month. That means 5 new recruits for the month. I have one new one so far. Four more to go!

Then there's this.......

Whether it's a mid-life (I don't actually think 30 is anywhere near mid-life) crisis or "girl gone wild" or whatever you would call it, I don't know. But, Tuesday night I did this......

That's right, yours truly is now a tattooed girl. I can hardly believe it myself! The guy who did it (who actually goes to my church, come to find out) thought I was kidding when I told him where I wanted it. Told me it was one of the most painful places to put a tattoo, but if I didn't get it there I really didn't want to get it. Why that spot, I am not sure....other than I can cover it very easily :) Anyhow, I figured if I could survive a c-section of two children in one sitting surely I could brave this. And I did! I think he was truly amazed. I did not "cry, scream or cuss" and he told me I would. Anyhow, I totally love it. It's not a great picture and I'll post some better ones tomorrow, but my sister has to send them to me first.

Why a bee you ask? Well, did you know that scientifically it makes no sense that the bee can fly? It's true. His wings should not be able to support his large body, but somehow, by the design of God, he flys. So, I say it is the same with me. It's a reminder that obstacles will never make me give up. If I really believe I can do it, I will. I will dare to believe that I can achieve God's best for my life. That's it....in a bee hive!

Cal-na-fornia

This is how Bekah says it. Cracks me up. Their favorite movie right now is "Cars". We routinely hear quotes from the movie at random times. Like today at the store, they are in my basket playing with the "yogrit" as they call it, and Rachel is just having a conversation with herself. Out of nowhere I hear: "Crazy grandpa car!" Then she and Bekah erupt in goofy laughter.

The other day I hear Bekah say to Rachel: "That's OK, Stickers, you can take Bessy." And this one: "Go take a car wash, hippie!" It's just too funny! Goes to show you that you really DO have to be careful what you let them watch!

Well, tonight as they are having their ritual Saturday night bath to prepare for church tomorrow, Bekah tells her yellow duckie: "I got to get of this town and get to Cal-na-fornia." HAHAHAHA!

Tomorrow, if I can remember how to download the pictures from my camera, I will post some very cute pictures of the girls playing with my wedding veil.

Jaded?

Today was a typical Monday. Full of the weekend's messes that had to be mended in the world of Child Welfare. This morning I sat in Court from 9am until 11:30am. Finally the Judge called my case. I say my case, but really I've only had the case for two months and it has had about 7 other workers since it was opened in 2001. Yes, you read that right. For 6 years now this case has been going through the system. No need to explain all the whys right now, but only to say that the mother on the case did not show this whole time I was waiting.

The minute after the judge sets a hearing for tomorrow morning for a default termination (meaning she didn't show they will terminate her rights by default), she walks through the door. The Judge, noticably irritated, calls all parties back to the bench. He asks her why she had not been there earlier. She stated she had to ride the bus. The Judge tells her he knows there are earlier buses that run by the Courthouse. The Judge asks mother's attorney how they wish to procede now since the case was actually set today for a Jury trial.

Her attorney takes her back and through a complicated series of events calls me over to say his client is going to relinquish her parental rights. Okay. So, I go back to my seat to wait for the Judge to recall our case and get a Court reporter to go on the record. We all get back to the bench and the Judge starts reading the relinquishment form. "You understand that by signing this document that you are voluntarily terminating your parental rights?" She nods yes, crying. "That no one has promised you anything in return for signing this document." "No" she says. "That you are entitiled to a jury trial in which the State would have the burden of proof to a jury to terminate your parental rights and by signing this you are giving up the right to a jury trial?" "What did you say before that?" She asks, crying more. Blank stares from every one. She looks at her lawyer, "Can I do that?" "Do what?" "That thing with the jury?" The judge looks at me in frustration. I look back, probably with the same look on my face. "Let's go off the record." Says the Judge. The lawyer takes the mother back into chambers again. You can hear him tell her that if she can't test clean today she won't stand a chance in front of the jury. Finally they come back out. She finishes her statement and that's it. After 6 long years in the system, the fight is over.

The thing is, when that moment at the bench came when seemingly the mother had changed her mind, I found myself thinking, "Oh my gosh, you cannot be serious that after 6 years you would put us all through a jury trial. Surely, you don't think any jury would give you the time of day as far as your children are concerned. I can't believe you are going to waste a whole week of my time in a trial when after 6 years you are still testing positive for drugs. Please just GET ON with it!"

Later that afternoon as I sat in another Judge's courtroom again awaiting my case to be called, I thought, have I really become so dispassionate so quickly? As she stood at the bench crying over rights given up for the four children she would never see again, was I so cold already that the only compassion I had was for my own time? On one hand I am angry at myself for feeling that way. Then, on the other, I am angry for four children who have spent the last 65 months in foster care hoping to go home, only to be told in the end it would never happen.

Where my compassion lies, I simply cannot say with certainty. But I find myself in the middle of a Monday Mess, wondering if there really is a "right" place to fall on this one. Wondering who it is that I have allowed this job to make me, and if there is a black and white when it comes to something like this. Or do I just live in the land of the Gray?

Bekah-isms

Where she got it, one cannot know, but Bekah seems to come up with the oddest things. Mostly noteably she refers to anything that happened "last night" as "yester night." It makes me chuckle every time I hear it:

Bekah: Daddy put me on pull-ups yesternight.
Me: Oh, he did?
Bekah: Yes, and I can not pee-pee in my bed becuase I'm just not posed to do that.

(At the zoo last week watching the Rhino's sans Daddy)
Bekah: Mommy, I need to take the baby Rhinocero (not a typo) home.
Me: Bekah, he cannot fit in our car
Bekah: But he needs to go in my room, I think
Me: I think she is a little big for your room, don't you? Where would she sleep?
Bekah: In my sleeping bag. I need to call Daddy so I can ask him.
Me: No.
Bekah: Yes, I do. We can just put him in the back of Papaw's pick-up.

(At the zoo today in the herpaterium)
Bekah: Oh d-d-d-dear (yes, we do see a lot of Pooh) look at that giant snake!!
Daddy: That's an Anaconda.
Bekah: An Anaconda? He's bigger than you Daddy!
Daddy: Yes, he is.
Bekah: We can not take him home. He might not like Elvis! (the cat)
Daddy: No, I don't think he would.
Bekah: And he cannot sleep in my room, either!

Random person: Oh, how cute, are they twins?
Me: Yes
Bekah: I'm not a twin, I'm Bekah
Person: You're not a twin sister?
Bekah: No, I'm just Bekah, that's all I am!

She is such a thinker, this girl. We are in for a real ride with her. I just know it!

Things are looking up!

It's been a rough winter for me. Some great things have happened, but "work-wise" it has just plain sucked. In October we lost a unit member and we all (my unit members) inherited four of her cases. Then, at the end of November we lost another unit member and we each received 5 of her cases. Then at the end of December we lost our supervisor. Then in January we lost our lead worker and each inherited 7 of her cases, bringing my total caseload to 39 cases. That is 91 children that were on my caseload. IMPOSSIBLE to try to manage, considering I am required to visit those children once per month. We had some people trying to help do visits, but some were reliable and some not so reliable. In all it was just a horrid mess.

I have really been struggling trying to juggle homelife, work and starting a new business. Let me tell you, it wasn't working AT ALL! My poor family has really been getting the short end of it.

This week we added two new unit members to our group and I was able to take 6 cases off my desk. 6 out of 39 is not huge, but for me it was fantastic! In a few more weeks I will lose probably another 5 cases to them and then we are also going to get a new lead worker that will take another 5 cases or so. That would get me back down to around 20 hopefully which is TOTALLY manageable. Policy states we are not to have more than 20, we will see if that actually happens. In the meantime, I am just thrilled to let go of even 6!

Also, I am pleased to announce that I have added my first team member in Mary Kay. I am really excited about that and hope to have a LOT more time to devote to MK now that my not so fun work is easing up. I am still have a blast doing MK. I have career conference coming up in March and another formal night and I know it will be a total blast!

Lost and Found

Lost: One gold wedding band engraved with the inscription: "To my Fred, love SJG"

FOUND: aformentioned gold band located by the Mother In Law of owner.

Yep, that's right. My dear, sweet, wonderful husband who has always given me such a hard time for taking off my wedding rings every night and who never takes his off LOST his wedding band. Since he never reads this blog unless I actually tell him to I am pretty sure I can post the story in its entirety and he will probably never know this.

I received a call from my mom yesterday while I was at work. "Did Fred lose something?" she asked with a little mischief in her voice. "Why, what did you find?" said, I, knowing she would never ask a question such as that unless she found something really good. "A wedding ring" she stated matter-of-factly. "WHAT?! He has not told me about this!" Knowing that it had been at least two days since he had been at their house.

So, last night he is showing me his dry cracked hands and I just say, "Oh look, you are single now it appears." Sheer horror covers his face and instantly I knew that until that moment he had not realized what was not there. He went nuts. Searching high, low and everywhere in between for that ring. He was totally out of sorts the whole evening.

Knowing that I had the ring this whole time I told him not to worry "it would surely turn up somewhere." And sure enough, it did. Right in his Valentine card today! He still has no idea how it slipped off over his big knuckles. Ah well, thank goodness mom found it or I too would have gone nuts.

Nobody leaves January without singing the blues...

At least this year it seems. January has just been a rough month so far. Many things at work have made it difficult, but this last weekend we were burried under close to 6 inches of ice. It looks like a bunch of snow, but it's SOOOO not! If you step out onto it you will qickly find that there are no prints to be left....just one solid, rock hard sheet of ice. Not even driving the Durango on it makes tracks. No pictures tonight tho...dead batteries in the camera and none on hand. So, they closed nearly everything at about noon last Friday and most everyone got a day off yesterday. However, today most of the working world got back to the grind.

This morning as I am drying my hair at about 6:45 I hear the sound of Fred's work boots thumping up the stairs. Not acustomed to him being around at that time, I was wondering why he was back home after leaving for work. Turns out he hit a patch of ice leaving our neighborhood this morning, slid over the curb and slammed into a brick retaining wall at the entrance of our edition. Fabulous! just fabulous...as if we needed on more thing to deal with. Oh well. At least he wasn't hurt and he didn't hit anybody else. He took the Durango in for an estimate: $2,000. OUCH!

The girls saw the car this morning and were very concerned about Daddy "breaking" the car. Bekah said, "oh well, I guess he'll have to get a new one." When I told them it didn't work like that and that Daddy would have to get it fixed, Rachel said, "Oh, I guess we have to call Handy Manny to bring Pat the hammer." (a fix-it cartoon on the Disney Channel). Cute! If only it were that easy. sigh...

This too shall pass... not too quickly tho as they are predicting 3-6 inches of snow this weekend and then another round next weekend. No rest for the weary!

Big Girl Beds

Despite all my efforts to keep the girls from growing up, alas, it has become a reality that often takes the breath out of me. Sunday night the girls moved from their baby beds to TWIN beds! Can you believe it?! Totally skipped the toddler bed. OY! They spent the afternoon Sunday with grandma and papaw and mommy and daddy dissasembled, re-arranged and put together their "new" beds. I say "new" becuase the beds they now have belonged to me and my sister when we were just barely older than the girls. I slept in that bed until I was 22 (sans the canopy however. I believe I shed that upon entering highschool). Putting up these beds really brought back memories for me. I am glad that my girls will now get to make good memories in them as well. So, without further delay, I present to you Rachel's and Rebekah's new beds.

Rebekah's bed (top) and Rachel's bed (bottom).

Bekah in front of her bed. Rachel by her bed.

They TOTALLY love everything about them. The canopy, the comforters -- all of it! It has taken me 30 mintues to get Rachel out of bed both today and yesterday morning. She cries and says that she "needs to sweep more." Bekah said, "It's like a tent, Mommy." They are just too funny. Yesterday they got home, went straight up to their room and refused to come down even to eat. We finally relented and just let them eat their dinner in bed. Silly girls! We have had NO trouble getting them in bed the last couple of nights. I wonder how long that will last?!

Hello Again!

Yes, It is I! The long lost blogger! I know it has been quite some time since I have updated this blog, but life has been so INSANELY crazy in the last two months. Here are the Cliff Notes on the "Life and Times of Sarah": Sarah runs 5k drops of the face of the earth, Sarah's sister gives birth to the Kade Russell on 10/25/06 (VERY pround Aunt here), 11/2/06 deciding she just had too much free time on her hands, Sarah becomes a Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant, Two caseworkers at work leave and Sarah's caseload doubles and her supervisor quits, Rachel and Rebekah TURN 3!!!!! (I can hardly believe it), Sarah's mom gets massive Kidney stone that requires surgery which did not go so well, and the most recent story, Sarah STILL trying to find time to purchase Christmas gifts! OY! So, there you have it. The recent events of yours truly.

Hopefully life will settle soon. Although I must admit, I REALLY am working hard on my Mary Kay business in hopes that I can replace my income by this time next year and stay home with my sweet girls. We'll see. It's getting late tonight so no more updates, but I'll leave you with a couple of cute pics and probably most of you will get a Christmas card from us sometime soon. Have a Candy Cane Hershey Kiss (my newest sinful addiction) on me!!!!!!!!!!

5K Day!

I DID IT! I ran the entire 5k! My goal was to finish in 33 minutes or less. I thought 31 was not happening, but I am pleased to say my official time was 30:51. I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I was about that! Here I am crossing the finish line.

There were so many people I would have been completely overwhelmed without Shala. I am such a newbie to all of this, that I just had no idea about so many things... that you line up where your pace is, that they shout out 1K times at you as you run... I am so glad she did this with me! The day was beautiful, although, that morning was very cold. It took us a while to warm up. About 1.5 miles in my pony tail started coming out and I was trying to run and get my hair back up at the same time, it was a pain, but no biggie. Shala helped me finish strong, which is something I need to work on. She told me to pick someone in front of me and try to pass them. She picked someone out and I tried, but I don't know if I passed her or not. :) Here we are trying to warm up before the race.
It was a great day. Not only did I have a friend to run with me, but Gwen and Joy came to see us finish and also my sister came along. She was excited for me, but, bless her heart, she is just hoping the extra walking will help labor start. She is fully efaced and dilated to a "2". She looks great tho!
Now, I need to find another race just to give me something to work toward.

Wiating on the washer

Ahhh, such is the life of the glamourous mom. I actually was thinking I would just love to go to bed - that thought occured to me about 8:30 this evening. Yet, here I am waiting to hear the ding of the washer telling me it's the dryer's turn.

Rachel got her cast off yesterday. Everything went fine, but it the process was not at all what I expected. The minute the doctor came into the room she started her "I don't want any doctors" chant. I can't really say I blame her. They cut off her cast off and then x-rayed it. You could easily see the new bone that had formed in the break. I expected that they would numb her elbow to take the pins out, but no such doing. The doctor took hold of her arm, grabbed a fancy looking pair of pliers and *yank* *yank* the pins were out! It took her by surprise obviously and I am sure hurt some as she peed right on Daddy's lap. Poor thing, she hasn't had an accident in ages, not even the whole time she was in the hospital and had surgery. She cried for a minute or so, not even very hard and then was done. She actually threw a bigger fit about the nurse giving her a red lollipop instead of a pink one. LOL! She is still nursing that right arm, not moving it much, but the Dr. said that would be normal and not to push her. We go back in 6 weeks for a check. It's just completely amazing to me how fast little ones heal!

In other news, I have 15 days until my 5k. I ran three miles for the first time last night. It was really tough for me to do last night. I am not sure why, but I know I was feeling tired, and then the dinner I ate was probably not the lightest thing I could have eaten before a run. Oh well, I am just starting to get excited!

Saturday marks the first day of October, the month in which I will become and Aunt!!!! Pam is doing well. She has entered that "uncomfortable all the time" stage of pregnancy in which comfort and restful sleep is a thing of the past. She saw her doctor yesterday and is not dilated at all, but is about 75% efaced. If he will stay 2 more weeks I think she will be just fine. That will put her at 38 weeks. I am starting to really prepare the girls for the giving of the itsabah (eats-ah-bah) or pacifiers to baby Kade. Every night I tell them that soon he will be here and we will take them to him because he will be a tiny baby and he'll need them and they are big girls and don't need them anymore. I am sure we'll have a couple of night of whining/crying out of Bekah, but I think Rachel will be ok. We'll see.

Well, I hear that familier ding-dong telling me the washer is done. I'm going to get the clothes out and get myself to bed!

We have a cast!

I am so relieved that it's done. I just feel so much better about her arm and how it's doing. The Doctor was so great with her. He came into the room with a little puppet and made her laugh before he started working on her arm. She did start crying when he started cutting off her bandages. She was saying, "Don't take my band aid off, my arm is broken. Don't take it off!" Once they started wrapping her arm back up she was fine. The doctor said the Xrays look great and he thinks the pins can come out in two weeks! I was really suprised to hear that, but happy.

Here are a few pics:
Pre-Cast:














The new purple cast:














And one of Bekah after she fell and said she broke her arm. She had a "broken" arm for all of maybe a minute.

My baby broke her arm.

Rachel broke her arm last night. We were starting our nighttime routine last night and the girls were picking out the books off the table behind the sofa. They were a little rowdy and I asked them to sit down. Rachel spun around too fast, lost her footing and tumbled right over the side arm of the sofa. I knew immediately that it was broken. I could see it. I yelled at Fred, we grabbed Bekah and raced to the ER. Fred didn't even stop to grab his shoes or his wallet.

When we got there they took her right back for Xrays. They told us it was a very bad break and that they would have to transfer us to Children's hospital because they did not have a pediatric othopedist. So, off we went in the ambulance to Children's. When we got there it was about 10:30pm. They called the orthopedist in and he said they would give her a medication, which all I can remember is it started with Cata-something, and would not put her under, but nearly and set the break. They made us leave and set it and told us they would admit her because there was a chance it would still need surgery. The break was on her right arm just above the elbow.

They got us up to a room at about 2am. Fred came home because he knew he would at least have to make an appearance at work. I stayed with Rachel and neither of us slept much at all. Finally about the time we both seemed to be falling asleep another doctor came in at 7:45am to tell us that the break serious enough that she would need surgery. I didn't even have 5 minutes to adjust to the news or to call anyone before the nurses came back and told me that we were going to the OR. She was so angry by this point when we were talking to the anestesiologist she was yelling, "NO DOCTORS!!!" Poor thing, I can't blame her.

They surgery went fine and her little arm is pinned to her side until next Wednesday. She has two pins. I have been a blubbering mess since last night, but am better now, just exhausted. Bekah did not sleep last night because she kept asking for Rachel. Rachel didn't sleep for the pain and for asking where Bekah was. They happily went to bed tonight. I just hope Rachel can sleep without feeling too much pain. We are doing tylenol with codeine and the Motrin regimine.

We go back next Wednesday and she will get a cast. She asked the nurse for a "purple band aid" so they are going to try to give her a purple cast. My poor baby. I just hate every minute of this. It has been hard to see them in pain for "little" things, but this has just been awful! I pray it heals quickly and all goes well. I thank God that at least the break missed her growth plates.

September

This poor blog has recieved no attention this last month. August was just about more than I could handle. September looks (I say that with great trepidation) to be a much better month. At least I can say whatever happens at work, I only have Court a few times and not twice every week like last month.

My mom goes to the Doctor for on the 13th. They are going to make a decision about what to do about her blocked artery. I plan to use 8 of my 57 comp time hours to have a day of play with my girls on the 13th!

I am making arrangements for my Dad to bring over my sewing machine that has been at their house since I graduated college over to the house. Of course, I am really only proficient at sewing straight lines, but I really need to alter some little girls' clothes so I am going to try to get some of that done. Of course, time being the much treasured possession I always seem to be in short supply of.

I have a little over a month until my 5k race. I am excited and nervous all at the same time! A friend of mine at church who is a marthon runner mentioned on Sunday that she might run it as well and I hope she does!

I also have something else to look forward to in November! I will get to spend a whole weekend with my One True Love the weekend of November 19th. We are going to visit our friends who got married in June. We are going to a Dallas Cowboys game on the 19th. It will be my first professional football game ever and I am SO excited! They are playing the Indianapolis Colts. I am really looking forward to having some time alone with Fred. I love the girls dearly, more than words, but I have really been longing for just a couple of days to have his undivided attention.

Saturday I am hosting my sister's baby shower brunch. I hope that it will be terrific fun and a great time for her. I can't believe the baby will be coming next month!!!! I am still preparing the girls for the "passing of the pacifiers" to baby Kade. :)

Things have been really crazy lately. Work is busy as usual but I have one particular case that has just blown up completely. It seems that the domestic violence situation that we suspected is much worse than we had even imagined. It's all out in the open now, but the the wife/mom has gone back to him and I am scared to death for her. It's a very difficult and time comsuming situation. Very hard for the children involved.

Then last week my mom had a arteriogram. It showed that she had a major artery that is 70% blocked. The Dr. doesn't exactly know how they are going to treat it. It is very close to her heart so that presents some issues for surgery. She went back to the Dr. today and it seems that what I feared the most is not their first suggestion, and that was bypass surgery. She goes for an echo cardiogram tomorrow that hopefully will reveal even more information in which they can finally make a decision about what to do.

In the mean time she is not allowed to watch the girls for two weeks. No lifting, no exertion of any kind for a couple of weeks. So, Fred's mom was so kind to come from Tulsa to help us out. She has been watching the girls here at the house. We are SO incredibly blessed to have such wonderful family to help us out.

I haven't been very good at keeping up with this blog lately. So much going on that when I get a free minute I'm sleeping! :)

Things have been going well, just busy. I had to take a week off running. I started having pain in my left knee about the 2 mile mark during my run. It seems it's due to ITB. I have been given some stretches to do and told to get some better shoes -- I think I'll do just that! :) I ran tonight and stopped twice to stretch. I hope it will get better as I keep working on it.

The girls are doing good with potty training. Rachel is done. She hasn't had an accident during the day in a long time. She had her first night accident in a while on Saturday night when it seems she woke up from a bad dream and was screaming. That, in turn, woke Bekah (who struggles at times with stopping what she is doing to use the potty) up with a start and she also wet the bed. So, at 3:20am Sunday morning I was up changing sheets, jammies, blankies and panties. By the time I got back in bed I was wide awake and never really got back to sleep before I had to get up for church. By the time we finished church I was about to fall over. I tried to take a nap when the girls did, but I must have just been over tired because I couldn't get to sleep then either! BAH!

Other than that there is not much going on. It's just been HOT! I am ready for Fall! It's not going to be under 100 this week. I need football and hot chocolate weather!

Date Night

It's been forever since Fred and I have gone on a date. Well, last night that all changed. We had one INCREDIBLE time! It was a GREAT concert! They played for over 3 hours and it was just them, no opening acts. Oh, you wanna know what concert it was??? Well, OK....
Singing Mississippi Girl... A cool one of the stage...you can see from my wide shot that we weren't all that close, but it didn't matter, sounded great and we could see them just fine. Faith looks really tiny in this one, HA! They both came in and out from the middle of the stage. The ever so pleasing to look at, Tim McGraw singing "Live like you were dying."
One of my favorites of them together (above). And one last one...

109

That was the high here yesterday. Humid and Hot. Not a good combination and no fun for running! It's been in the mid to high 90's even after 9pm. OY! We are getting a break today, though, it's only supposed to be 95! LOL! OH! And today, for the first time, I pushed past two miles. 2.25 - not much, but baby steps work. It will get me there eventually, right?

After my last potty training post the girls turned a corner overnight and are now doing fantastic! We even left the house in panties last night and not pull-ups! We went to eat and half way thru dinner I noticed Bekah squirming around. I asked her if she needed to go to the potty and she said, "Yes, I sure do, Mommy." Rachel said she needed to go too and so we all trotted of to the bathroom. Both of them went and then I had to go. While I was sitting there Bekah came over and grabbed both of my arms and was squeezing the heck out of them. I asked her what she was doing and she said, "I'll hold you up, Mommy. Don't fall in!" HAHAHA! I was laughing so hard! Hopefully success will continue! Hooray!!!

Progress Report

Potty training did not go quite as well as I hoped it would. It has been a struggle, especially with Rachel. Bekah is doing very good, until she gets tired, then she has accidents. Today she only had 3 accidents all day, not bad! But dear Rachel has really had a hard time with this. She knows when she needs to go, and you can tell when she needs to, but she refuses to sit on the potty. She will just go wherever she is. Once I asked her why she didn't tell me so she could sit on the potty, her answer, "the potty hurts." Oh great! Just what I wanted to hear. She makes a tiny tiny bit of progress every day. Hopefully someday soon it will "click" and she will do it.

The first two nights she peed in her bed about 5 minutes after putting her down and me begging her to try to go on the potty. She would just scream like somebody was just hurting her. Last night I decided to try pull-ups at night and she absolutely threw a fit. She did NOT want to wear them, she wanted her "Cinderella panties", and for the first night didn't have any accidents. Tonight I did not have any clean panties for her so she had to wear a pull up and just did not like it at all. Poor baby. And then there is Bekah who does great with the potty, but begged to wear a pull up. OY! These girls! I just keep telling myself that one day this will all be over and they really will use the potty all the time.

Marathon....

Not the running sort, mind you, but something entirely of a foreign nature.

Today we said good-bye to diapers for what I hope will be forever. We are going cold turkey. We have been building up to this for a while it seems. When Rachel came to me this last week with a diaper in hand and said, "Mommy, I'm stinky again", I knew there was no denying that the time was upon us.

So, this weekend I will be pumping them full of liquids in hope that get them to the potty as much as possible. I know there will be accidents, but practice makes perfect - so my paino teacher always told me. :) For rewards they will be getting the much coveted, but never before tasted Hershey Kisses.

Bekah did actually go on the potty tonight and was SO proud of herself. She was nearly beside herself with excitement in picking out which kind of Hershey Kiss she wanted (after all I had to get 4 kinds, LOL - Caramel, dark chocolate, milk chocolate and the new peanut butter filled!). It was too cute!

29 and counting...

Sunday I celebrated my very last year in my 20's! It's hard to believe that next year when I celebrate, I won't be celebrating a 20-something year! Yikes!!! It was a great birthday celebrated with family and I did enjoy it! The girls blew out all my candles at least three times. I am reasonably sure they thought it was their birthday, HA!

In other news, last Thursday I came home to mail that was just for me! It's so much fun to get mail that's not bills or notices etc. Instead, it was 3 great editions of Runner's World from a really great lady who is my running inspiration! OK, so, there's one missing...it's upstairs by on my nightstand...I didn't feel like going up to get it :) Thank you, Ms. Nomer!!! I am really enjoying them and appreciate it so much!

I had not run since last Tuesday, my herniated disc in my lower back was really giving me fits last week, but as of tonight I am back in the saddle. It was not an easy run tonight, but I made it and for now, that's all it takes!

My Naked Chefs

They wanted to "cook" instead of taking a bath. Too cute not to share :)

I DID IT!!!!!

I can't believe it, but I really did it! I ran two whole miles this morning! No, stopping, no walking! I was tired, but excited. I can't believe I made it to this point. I would have never thought I would be able to, but HOORAY!!!! This is just really an incredible personal milestone for me.

I am off to sleep now. It stormed for about two hours last night with house-shaking thunder that kept me up for two hours and I am pretty exhausted. I wish it would just rain, that would be nice, but the thunder just gets to be too much when it's the middle of the night. Ah well, at least no threat of tornados.

Progress...

Measured in a minute. Maybe not much to most of you, but for me, I am very excited! I am finally starting to get into some major running minutes. Tonight I ran 8 mintes walked 5 and then ran 8 more. Next time I am supposed to do my warm up walk of 5 minutes and then run the whole 20, but I may repeat what I did tonight one more time. I also found out the route I have been running is two miles. That's good to know!

I have decided when I can run the whole twenty minutes I'll by myself some running shorts. So, if anyone has any suggestions let me know!

HOT! HOT! HOT!

Summer is here with a bang! It's been 100 or at least high 90's for the last 7 days at least. It doesn't look like it's going to end anytime soon. I went running last night at 8:30 and it was still in the 90's. I looked like I had taken a dip in the pool by the time I got back!

I took the girls out to my parent's house for a swim yesterday afternoon and they seemed to have more fun standing on the side of the pool throwing their Veggie Tales toys into the skimmer for Papaw to get out then actually being in the pool. Silly girls.

In other baby news (yes, I do know they are not really babies anymore, but indulge me for a moment) I have finally decided on a method for pottie training. We've tried a couple with no success and it was recommended to me that if you try something and it's not working you should stop and wait 30 days before trying something new. This site was recommended to me and I ordered the book. It's a very different concept in pottie training methods, but one that I have personal testimony from people who have tried it and been successful with it. Now, I just need three uninterupted days at home with them to do it!

We survived our first vacation with the girls. It was fun, but I will say it was definitely a challenge that at times we were wishing we had not taken up. There were little things along the way that weren't to bad, it was just the one day we really needed the girls to take a nap that was so horrid. It was the day we went to the Grand Ole Opry in the evening. We had toured the Country Music Hall of Fame and the Ryman Auditorium earlier in that day, then the very minute we got back in the van they were OUT! It took us 10 minutes to get back to our hotel and in then they woke up and absolutely refused to sleep again. We tried everything! Patted backs, laid down with them anything we could think of, but without success. So, that night at the Opry they were crazed little girls. Fred and I both missed the first 15 minutes of the concert and I missed a lot more. Oh well, at least my mom got to enjoy it and that's what we really wanted. The girls did, however, do great in the car. All that time in the van and they still beg to ride in it!

I have recovered from the tumble down the stairs and am doing good. I didn't get to run for a whole week and I could feel it. Last night I went running and just for the heck of it I tried to push myself just to see what I could do. I ran four minutes walked two for my 30 minutes and was suprised I could do it. It was not easy at the end though, but I am proud to say I did it!

Now, just for fun, here's a couple of pics of my cuties!

I am beginning to wonder if it might be getting time to shape up some girls hair a little. There's still not a whole lot of it, but it's starting to look pretty scraggley. Here is a picture of the girls walking down the stairs at the Ryman Auditorium.

Accidents Happen

This has just not been my week. For some reason my alarm did not go off this morning and I woke up 30 minutes late. So, i was running around trying to get showered, dressed and everything ready in 30 minutes. That, of course, meant that I was getting the girls up late. Both of them were sleepy mode this morning and didn't want to walk down the stairs. Trying to save time I picked up Rachel with my left arm and Bekah with my right. Off we went. Somewhere around the second or third step from the bottom my left foot slipped out from underneath me and down we all went. I instinctively held tight to the girls and somehow managed to fall backwards and hang on the both girls. Bekah slipped down on my side but didn't fall.

I have no idea what I landed on, just that I felt major pain in my neck and shoulders. I asked Bekah if she was alright and got, "I'm just a fine, Mommy." I was sitting on the last step trying to catch my breath, and Rachel said, "Mommy, hurt?" I told her that yes, mommy was hurting. So, Bekah leaned over and kissed my shoulder and said, "All better now, Mommy." It was very sweet. I do wish I could have fixed it all.

Unfortunately, after dropping the girls off getting into work I could barely move my head and neck. I told my supervisor what had happend and she told me to get to the doctor. I got my case that was going to court today ready in case I didn't make it back and headed out to my Chiropractor. The verdict was Whiplash. Not fun. She adjusted my neck and back and told me that I would really be sore tomorrow. I guess nothing I can do about it now.

Lesson learned: Taking one girl down that stairs at a time really doesn't take that much more time

What is that saying?

Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Right? I am pretty sure I experienced this first hand yesterday in a courtroom. I got totally blasted by a judge yesterday for not only not having the most recent drug test of a mother and father on one of my cases (even tho I was told I did have them by the parents), but also because I did not test the mother for Methadone, which is a legal substance in Oklahoma. However, I am now under a court order to test her for this, which I am pretty sure violates her civil rights. Hmmm....but, nothing for me to do as I have NO power. C'est La Vie! I suppose... I am counting down the days until next week, vacation here I come!!!!!

Upping the Ante

This week I am going from a 20 minute interval run to 25 mintes. I also ran for 5 solid at the end, which was not easy. It had been a long day at work and I was tired, so that was a challenge for me. But I'll keep it up and do it again tomorrow!

A friend from church who is a foster -soon to be adoptive- parent and I are considering starting a small group at our church for those who are foster parents or who are considering being foster parents. We think that in a church of 10,000 there has to be something we can do to create support for foster parents and also to recruit those who might be considering becomeing foster parents. So, keep us in your prayers as we consider what we can do to help provide for these kids in need. Currently the state of Oklahoma has approximately 14,000 children in state custody and only 7,000 available placements. That means a lot of these kids have to stay in shelters, group homes and other various places that aren't exactly a warm and loving environment. These kids are in the system thru no fault of their own and deserve some love and stability, even for only a short time.

And 1 more makes 4!

Happy 4th Anniversary to my Fantastic, Helpful, Understanding husband! This is not the best picture I have of our wedding day, but it was the one most available, so it's the one you get tonight! :) It's hard to believe it's been 4 years. Really, that's such a short amount of time, but it feels much longer -- in a good way, though. So, SO much has happened in these last four years, I never would have guessed on this day four years ago that we would have: 1) Both made major career changes 2) struggled and beat the monster of infertility 3)expanded our family by 2 members 4) sold two houses and bought one 5) endured 12 of the most excruciating weeks of Hep C treatment for Fred, only to have it fail. It's really been something! And, while there have been times that have been very tough, I would not trade a minute of my years with my wonderful Fred! We have been so blessed!

Thank you, Fred, for being the wonderful man you are and being my rock of support. You make me smile and feel special every day! You are truly a gift from God! I love you!

A fried of ours who graduated seminary recently told us that it is not suggested that people make more than one major life change in a year's time. I can't think of a year when we had less than one major life change. We've made it thru and are more devoted to each other now than we were then. No matter how life changes, at least I know that as long as we are here on this earth my Fred will be right beside me.

Liar, Liar Pants on Fire

My sweet, tiny, demure little Bekah told me a big fib for the first time on Saturday. I had made sausage for breakfast at the request of said tiny one. She was the only one eating it, so I knew when I saw sausage on the floor by a little wooden rocking chair, where it came from. I said, "Who made this mess on the floor?" Big brown eyes looked up at me and said, "Elbis did it!" Hmm...last time I checked, Elvis, being a cat and all, didn't eat sausage. I explained to Bekah that Elvis didn't eat any of the sausage, only Bekah did. So, I asked my question again. The tiny little one looked at me and pointedly restated, "Mmmmoooommmeeee!!!!!!! Elbis DID it!!"

I hate to admit it, but I was fighting hard to keep from laughing on one hand, and crying on the other. I can't believe they have gotten to the point of understanding how to lie! AGH! Where are my litle girls going?! Bekah had to sit in the naughty chair for her deed, and after that fessed up to her doings. My work has only just begun.

2 Down - Countless days to go

I mentioned a while back that I had agreed to run a 5k in October. I started running Tuesday using this plan. The first day was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be. Today was a little more difficult than I expected. HA! Things really never are what you expect. I have no idea why this would be, but no matter, I did it!

Tomorrow is my very last day of CORE training. That means next week I go to work in the "real world." I actually enjoyed being in class. It was kind of nice just go to class, yak with coworkers on break, think about what I was having for lunch. It was almost like being in highschool again, only not as much homework!

I did have to conduct a mock interview today on video. OY! I hate watching and hearing myself on video. I hope that I did OK with it. I have to say that after watching training videos of how interviews should go, my skills are rudimentary at best. I know it's something you learn over time and experience, but to think I will have to be doing this for real starting next week is more than nerver-wrecking!

I wish I had a fast forward button to skip the "learing process" at the beginning. But, even our very seasoned instructors say they still make mistakes in interviews. I guess the human factor means mistakes are always present, no matter how competant of an interviewer you are.

I just had to post that Bekah peed on the potty today! YAY! I know that's not a lot of excitement for most of you, but I am SO proud of her!

Rachel still has no interst, LOL. I am not worried yet. Now, if she turns 5 and is still saying, "No yike pee pee potty" then I'll be concerned. =)

My chicken turned out great! Thanks again to Earle-girl for the recipe!

Now, as promised, a real update!

Things are going very well here, just very busy. I have this week and next week left in training. Then, they cut me loose. I hope I can keep myself together, learn not to take things so personally where attorney's and judges are concerned, and find a medium between wanting to bring all these kids home with me or just run the other direction. The thought of holding the future of a family in my hands is an awesome responsibility that I am not sure I could ever really be prepared for.

I had planned to start my Couch to 5k running program yesterday, but, alas, my best made plans were laid to waste when I was released from class early only to find my car deader than a doornail! Luckily, a couple of girls helped me push it to a different spot (hooray for a standard) and gave me a jump. I made it to my parent's house to get the girls, and there my dad took over. He cleaned the battery cables, tested it, replaced the cables - all to determine it was "failing under load" - whatver that car speak means?! I am just thankful dad knows! =) Daddy's are great! So, off we went to get a new battery! It was about 8 when I made it home last night, and after all that excitement I just did my regular exercise. But, I will do it! OH! This week also marks a year since I reached my goal weight and celebrated a 65 pound weight loss! WOHOO!

In girl news, they had their first real word argument the other night. We were coming home from dinner with some friends when it just barely started to rain. Rachel said, "It's rainin'! Get umbredella (umbrella)". A couple of seconds later we hear Bekah quietly say, "It's not rainin'." Rachel reacted and responded, "It's rainin', Bekah!" "It's not rainin', Chachel!" "IT'S RAININ' BEKAH!!!!!!!" It was too funny!

P.S. Earle-girl, I am trying your chicken recipe tomorrow night! Hope it works out! =)

My poor neglected blog

It's been so long since I posted an update, I promise to do it tomorrow, but it's too late tonight and I am too tired. :)

Caution! Kids at Play!

The girls are just too much fun lately. They are always saying the funniest things. This morning while they were still in their beds I was getting their bag ready to go, I was listening to Bekah on the monitor. It went something like this:

"Mommy? Mommy! Bekah's stinky!!" something inaudible, "What Darlin'?" said two or three times. "Ok, Mommy Chachel's up now, come oooonnnnn!"

Then tonight when they pulled down Daddy's bead curtain, Rachel says, "Oh! Dear me!" HAHAHA! I think that one came from a Pooh toy they have.

Tonight while I was making dinner Fred called me into the playroom. This is what I found.
Bekah had cleared all the books off that shelf and decided it would be a good place to hang out, I guess.
Rachel was busy playing with their farm animals. Here she is laying on top of the play table.

They are just so much fun right now. I wish I could just put things on pause for a while and enjoy this all for a little longer.

Bekah's Big Day

Today a major thing happened in toddler world! Bekah pooped on the potty! HOORAY!!!! At first she didn't seem to understand. She said "Uh Oh!" and seemed concerned she had done something wrong. We really cheered for her and I think in the end she felt ok with it, but I don't expect this will be a regular occurance yet. But I am excited none-the-less.

In other news I have agreed to run the race for the cure in October with a couple of girls from my new job. One is currently pregnant and due at the end of June. I figure if she can do it, then I should be able to. So, I am going to try this running "thing" again. I guess I better go find my Couch to 5K running plan and dust it off. I have to say tho, until it's really spring (we are expecting snow tomorrow) I am not even going to attempt it. I'm just a wuss. =)

Testing...Testing..1..2..3..

Does this thing still work?!

Well, I just finished a huge marathon reading tour this last week. A wide variety of subjects from domestic violence to poverty to the history of our agency. This morning I had to take a test on all of it. It's been quite a while since I have had to take a test so I was a little nervous. I wanted to do really well because the results for the class are emailed to every supervisors with students in this class. I missed 6 out of 58 and scored a 90. Not bad, but the perfectionist in me is not that happy. I had three of them right and second guessed myself and ended up missing them, BLEAN! Oh well, I guess a 90 will suffice.

I am behind on my Bible reading by about two weeks, but I am hoping I can catch up. I am also catching up on laundry and housework and everything else -- and I want to go back to school????? Makes me a little tired just thinking about it.

No other news really. We finally got nearly two inches of much needed rain this weekend. Hopefully it will abate the high fire risk we have been under for so long.

And for good measure, a Bekah funny:
Grandma: "Bekah, can grandma have a bye-bye kiss?"
Bekah: "No, it's all papaw's! ....Bekah's weally punny" (cute giggling)

I'm no Chicken....

Cook, that is. I have such a hard time cooking chicken?! I don't get it?! For some reason I always seem to either end up with "blackened" chicken or it's just not quite done. UGH! I really enjoy eating it, I just don't know why I can't seem to find a good way to make it. Steak I can do, veggies, bread made from scratch...I've got it down. Chicken, however, seems to be the bane of my cooking life.

I was making it last night and ended up with a smokey house. So, I invite everyone, if you have some good ones, please share your chicken cooking tips with me. Poor Fred can't take much more of it! =)

The new job

I started a whole new life (work wise) on Monday. I am totally and completely swimming in a sea of regulations, rules, and work. I start my training on the 20th, but before I can do that I have a long list of things to read and do. Just the regulations of law alone are enough to make me insane. Not to mention I have to take a test on it all the first day of training.

I have been shadowing workers all week as they do different things. I have been to court to watch workers like myself testify before the judges and DA's about whether the parent (most of the time, mother) is completeling her drug treatment plan and testing negative for drugs. I have supervised a visition between parents and child, and then today I visited a local hospital that had called for the third time today to report a baby born who tested positive for Meth.

I have to say it is going to be very difficult to find that place within myself where I can get over my anger and be empathetic enough to try to get the parents to a place where they want to help themselves enough to be responsible parents. Unfortunately, the caseworkers tell me that more often than not, parental rights are terminated. I cannot even imagine.

This morning when I dropped the girls off with my mom Rachel had the first ever "Mommy don't leave me" meltdown. I supposed I should count my blessings we made it this far, but by the time I actually did get out the door I was crying right along with her. As a drove to work after that, I thought about all the things I had seen in just my two short days on the job. I was so afraid I was being a dissapointent to Rachel, as a mother, and here I was working with mothers who felt no remorse for subjecting their poor unborn children to a life sentence of debilitating problems. It's going to really take a lot of learning on my part to understand the process of thought of some of these people. Well, understand may not be the right word. I don't know that I will ever understand, but you get the idea.

I fear the hardest lesson will be the one that comes with no instructions, regulations or books, and that will be the emotional lessons. Getting past my indignation and anger and finding compassion enough to try to help these mothers. I think the thing that is going to humble me the most is thinking that Christ not only gave his life for me, but He did the same for that drug addicted mother sitting across the table from me. If He can love her that much, I can learn to do it too with His help.

A Perfect Day

It is a most glorious first day of March! The sun is out, the wind is only slightly blowing and it's 86 degrees! What a shame to be inside. I went out for about 15 minutes just to enjoy it. They are renovating an old hotel across the street. Looks like they are restoring the original facade and it's going to look nice.

I am down to only four cases left here at work. Everything else is all squared away and delegated out. My office is really looking sparse. Little by little this week I have taken home most of my belongings. I still can't bring myself to take the pictures off the wall. =)

Not much in the way of other news. Well, we are finally getting our hot tub rewired after our move two years ago. It's just been sitting outside, loney and neglected all this time. Life has really changed from two years ago! I am sure we'll still have some chilly nights to get some good use out of it. After all, this is Oklahoma and if there's one thing you can count on with the weather, it's inconsistent. HA!

A joyful announcement!!!!!

This day belongs to my dear twin mom friend, Tracy! She announced an addition to her family today! A little girl, who will come to them from China! I still have chills reading the big news!!!!

The mourning has begun

One week from today I will be closing the door on what has been one of the biggest building blocks of my life. I am still not sure I will ever feel ready to leave. All of my work is starting to get passed on, but I feel this need to hang on to it for some reason. I am having a harder time letting go of it than I imagined. Wathcing someone else doing "my" job has been like fingernails scratching a chalkboard for me.

There's a box over in the corner of my office that I was finally able to pack away some of my things in, but I couldn't bear to see it sitting there so now it's behind the desk. I am still not ready to take my pictures off the wall. Despite all the angry callers, crazy cases and never ending work, I really will miss all of this. I am sure next week is going to be even worse...

*sigh*

I need a good baby girl hug and sloppy kiss and all will be right with the world again.
OK, I feel better now =)

In a world of "E's"

If it's not Exodus it's Elmo. Seriously, how many times can one enjoy "Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland" before they are reduced to a babbling shell of what they once were? Padded cell anyone? Sign me up! I am sure there is a waiting list of mothers of two year olds just waiting to escape the Elmo world their children wish to live in. I woke up singing "it's all about your point of view, in life it's all about your point of view." Sung by the "Queen of Trash" in the aforementioned flick.

The thing is, it's a seriously cute movie if you don't have to watch it 3 times a day. Yes, I know, the parenting Nazi's can gasp with horror at this fact, but sadly it's true. Call me crazy, but even at three times a day it's still easier to listen to Mandy Patinkin sing than screams of "ELMO BLANKET BACK NOW!" all day long. OY!

My exegesis of Exodus

I am finding it so difficult to get thru Exodus. I am struggling to keep up with my daily reading simply because I feel almost like I have read the same thing over and over again. It's really great if you need exact instructions on slaughtering a bull or lamb, building a temple or what to wear if you are a priest. I don't really mind reading it, but I feel like it gets repeated about 4 times at least by now -- three more chapters. I can make it!

We have quite a bit of snow on the ground here. It's very pretty if you don't have to drive on it. Today brought a full day of freezing rain, not so good. I guess the weather is trying to remind us that winter is not over. The good news is I don't have to work tomorrow. Yeehaw!

Long time coming

It's been a while since I updated this thing. Really nothing much to write about. I am busy busy at work trying to get everything ready to leave for someone else. That has kept me more than occupied.

Valentine's day was nice. Fred and I went on a date to celebrate on the 13th (so much less crowded). We had dinner at this nice little English restaurant. The Shepard's pie was great! Then we went and tried out new mattresses. We are seriously thinking of purchasing a Sleep Number bed. I must say after trying it out, I really want one!

I am also on a quest for the "perfect" black business/dress shoes. I have been searching for a couple of weeks without luck. Something with a heel between 2.5" and 3". A shoe that would transition well for Spring. I can't decide between a round or pointy toe. Here are a few I have seen that I would consider, but I can't say that if I left the store without them I would be heartbroken. These I think are nice, and of course, Fred loves them because they have "Carlos Snatana" attached to them. I love this one, but it's really more money than I wanted to spend. *sigh* Surely somewhere out there is the great vast world of black shoes is a pair that is cute, affordable and just waiting to become my favorite!

It's a done deal...

I gave my two weeks notice today (well, it's going to be three actually). It was a LOT harder to do than I had anticipated. I cried. It's just so hard to leave people that have really watched me "grow up."

When I came here 7 years ago, I was right out of college, they were with me when I bought my first house, then I got married, then we struggled with infertility, then twins...now this. They will still be my friends, of course, but it won't be the same. I won't come to work everyday and be able to tell them what funny thing the girls did last night or gripe about what is going on at work. I know this job ends for all of us and the end of the year, and I knew some of us would leave before then - but I didn't think it would be me. How do you say "good bye"?

To say I am nervous about all this would be a lie. To tell the truth, I am absolutely terrified! My boss said all good changes are painful. This is definitely painful, so I hope that transaltes into - good change.

You never know what a day might bring

Yesterday at 4pm, I recieved a phone call from a lady I worked for nearly 10 years ago when I was in college. I worked for her at a place called the CARE Center. It was a place where kids who had just been removed from their homes came for interviews. I was in charge of playing with them, getting them comfortable and stuff like that. It was a fun job. She wanted me to come work for her 7 years ago when I took this job, but God had other plans for me.

She heard that my boss is leaving Congress to run for Governor and called me up a couple of weeks ago to talk about me possibly coming to work for her again sometime later in the year. Long story short, she called yesterday to offer me what I think could possibly be the job of my dreams. I wasn't at all planning on leaving what I am doing so early, but this offer may be too good to turn down if the pay is right. I know I'll be taking a pay cut to do this, but if it's enough for us to make it on, I am pretty sure I am going to take it.

What is the job, you ask??? Well, I would be working with drug exposed babies and their families. There is a LOT more involved with that, but that's it in a very small nut shell. One of the most apealing things about this is that I would be eligible for a program that would pay for me to get my Master's degree. Something I have wanted to do for ages. I'll find out at 1:30 today whether or not this is workable. I sure hope so!

Weekends are never long enough. There's always something I didn't get done. Although, I didn't go to church yesterday so I was able to get almost every bit of laundry done and put away. Why did I play hookie from church, you ask? Well, I really didn't think anyone would care to look at my still very swollen cyclops eye.

I went back to the Dr. this morning and he had to lance it. It was not a pleasant experience. First, he tried to spray the infected spot with a numbing agent. Unfortunately, that just got into my eye where it stung so bad I wanted to say a whole string of words unbecoming of a lady. The good news is that he took care of it, and hopefully it will get better. We'll see.

In other news Winter is supposedly making a come back. Of course, so typical for February. Tomorrow is supposed to be our warmest day of the week at 55 degrees. Saturday the forecasted high is 30! Should be fun!

Fat Friday

I have the fattest swollen eye I think I have ever seen. It started swelling yesterday and this morning I got up and it was nearly swollen shut. So, I got into the Dr. today and he said it was a badly infected tear duct. Nearly so bad that he thought I might have to have it lanced! OUCH! Apparently my sinus infection from last week caused it. I had to get an antibiotic shot plus I have to take 4 1000mg pills of Augmentin per day. OY! I guess it's a good thing I did not attempt to blow it off!

No big plans for the weekend. I just hope my eye gets better!

February already!

It's hard to believe that January of '06 is one for the history books! Where does the time go?! So far, so good tho! At least January went out with a bang! Congratulations to my dear friend, Jenn, on her new little blessing, Lucy!

No other news to report here, really. I did buy the girls a "pee pee potty" as Bekah likes to call it. They will sit on it, but that's about it so far. :) This is OK with me as I don't plan on pushing potty training, and really didn't even want to start at all until the summer. But both of the girls are constantly talking about the potty, so I figured I should at least encourage them a little. Can't hurt, right?

One month down on my Bible reading. I was able to finish January caught up, even tho I had a few days to catch up on from being sick last week.

Happy February, everyone!

A First

Last night Fred and I got a date night! The first one we have had in a long time. We really are more football fans than anything, but then again, we have never had an NBA team here before. But, with the relocation of the New Orleans Hornets to OKC, even temporarily, we decided to go show our support!

We had a blast! The game was exciting and high energy and we won! YAY! We beat the Milwaukee Bucks by one point with .1 seconds left on the clock. Very exciting! Fred cheered so much he got hoarse, and (upon my horror) started dancing like one of the Hornet's HoneyBee cheerleaders! Of course, I had to make him stop immediately before I died of complete embarrassment! But, all told, we really had a blast!

Today the NBA will be announcing whether or not the Hornets will stay in OKC for another year. I can't see any sense in moving the team back to N.O. right now. The NO/OKC Hornets are averaging a crowd of about 18, 200 in attendence at every game. In New Orleans they were nearly last in the league for attendence. Practical business $en$e would say to leave them where they are most successful. Hopefully we'll get an opportunity to host them again next year, and perhaps even on a permanent basis!

"All those who think they've got it made, please step forward! Not so fast there, Sarah!"

Yes, apparently I am not as lucky as I thought I was when it came to escaping the germs being passed around the house. It seems that obsessive hand washing and clorox wiping everying was not enough. About 2 am yesterday morning I awoke with chills and with the most awful "headache" I have ever experienced. Turns out I have a severe sinus infection.

Against my better judgement I went to work today. By 11 am I could take it no more and left. Came home, tried to sleep, couldn't stop coughing, so I gave up. The girls were still at my mom's so I decided a movie was what I needed. My favorite movie was calling my name. No matter how many times I watch it, I'll never get tired of it. Father of the Bride. It just brings back good memories of when I used to dream of my own wedding. And if that wasn't enough when that one was done, I went on to watch Father of the Bride, Part II. There is just something so perfect about the comedic timing of the Diane Keaton/Steve Martin/Martin Short trio that I cannot resist.

I am off to try to sleep, hopefully the coughing will go away, and I'll be better for work tomorrow. If not, I guess it's more chick flicks for me. :)